I love getting things in the mail. Not junk mail or solicitations for funds (though I do chuckle to myself when mail comes addressed to "Rev. Trgovac".) But packages. Packages full of strange and wonderous things. When I was 10, I realised that I could combine two of my obsessions: getting things in the mail and planning my wedding (we started early in Texas). One day, when flipping through a bridal magazine, I saw an ad for wedding invitations. And it said "We will send you a sample book of invitations for no charge." Sample book of invitations! No Charge! Sign me up.
So I did.
To four different services.
When these very large boxes started to arrive, my stepmother was a bit concerned. "How much did these cost you?" she asked, quite reasonably. "They were FREE!" I shouted as I rummaged in the kitchen drawer for an exacto knife.
She didn't say anything as I ripped open the box, pulled out this HUGE scrapbook of wedding invitations, stationary, thank you cards, reception cards and other glorious nuptual paper-products. It must have weighed fifteen pounds. I lugged it over to the bean bag chair, flopped down, and proceeded to make a list of my favourite items. )NB: The curious reader will ask, "Why were you making a list? Were you really getting married at 10?" The answer of course is "No. I just wanted to be prepared.")
My stepmom watched me for a bit, then picked up a piece of paper that had fallen out of the package. She read it and then turned to me ... "Kate? You know you have to return these books, right?"
"Hmmm??" I replied, absorbed in the sparkly, embossed, silver butterflies. Oooo ... I'd never see that particular sea-foam green before. Do I like that or the midnight blue better?
"Return them. You have to return them."
"Yes, right. OK. I have to return them."
"And how are you going to pay for the postage to send those books back?"
"They're free. I don't have to pay for them. The ad said Free."
My stepmother nodded. "Yes, it was free to get them. But you have to send them back. And you'll have to pay the shipping."
Screeeeech. This was not making sense to my 10 year old mind.
"But the AD said they were FREE!" I think that I thought yelling would make my point clearer. To my stepmother's credit, she did not think this, and repeated, quite patiently. "Yes, it was free for them to send it to you. But you have to return it to them. And you will have to pay the postage to ship them back." And then I think it dawned on her that I had a number of bridal magazines in my room. "How many of these did you order?"
"Four."
"Oh."
She and I made a deal that I would do some extra chores and she would return the books for me. Very reasonable to me now, but in my 10 year old mind I was betrayed. Betrayed by the promise of free stuff. And wise to the world of shipping charges.
Fast forward twenty-some years. I'm still signing up for Free stuff via postal mail. Enter Valleyschwag! Finally! A way to get cool stuff AND to satisfy both my postal habit and my geek lust. A monthly subscription gets you cool schwag from the valley's hotest startups - items that are at a premium here in the great white north. If I can't be in the Valley, at least I can have a sticker on my laptop that says I know about a cool company in the valley (yeah, I know .. kinda sad).
But the other thing is, I'm not alone. There are postal addicts all over this big world. There's even a Frappr map for us. Someone in Iceland wants schwag! According to a post on Valleyschwag's blog, there are 57 of us Canucks on the list. Pretty cool. Anyone else out there want to self-identfy? I'm actually going to post the list of country recipients, because I think its pretty amazing.
Here’s the running tally of subscribers per country (alphabetized):
Argentina = 1
Australia = 49
Austria = 11
Belgium = 9
Brazil = 2
Canada = 57
Chile = 1
China = 2
Cyprus = 1
Denmark = 8
Estonia = 1
Finland = 4
France = 36
Germany = 40
Greece = 2
Hong Kong = 2
Hungary = 1
Iceland = 1
Ireland = 5
Israel = 6
Italy = 12
Japan = 3
Latvia = 3
Malaysia = 2
Malta = 1
Mexico = 1
New Zealand = 9
Netherlands = 18
Norway = 6
Poland = 2
Portugal = 3
Spain = 16
Sweden = 13
South Korea = 1
South Africa = 6
Singapore = 4
Slovenia = 1
Switzerland = 6
Turkey = 1
Uruguay = 1
United Kingdom = 164
United States = 994
Slovakia = 1
This speaks to the global nature of what we're all doing, as well as the global nature of my postal addiction. Rock on, brothers and sisters! Once this month's care package arrives, I'll post pics. Also, if you sign up, tell 'em Kate sent you. And who knows, in addition to stickers, pens and tshirts, maybe next month's package will contain Wedding Invites 2.0.
